Wanted: Willingness to Ask and Accept Help

Hello again…this past week was a little more hectic than I anticipated, and as a result of it, here I am on a Monday when I’m normally posting a new creative challenge, answering last week’s question instead.

Oh well, we’ve got to run with what life hands you and this week, it handed me a one-day delay. (Expect a new creative challenge in your inbox on Tuesday instead of Monday!)

My most recent question posed asked you to consider the possibility of enlisting the assistance of others to make improvements in your life. Specifically, I asked: What are some areas in your life where you could reach out to others for support, skill-building or knowledge to help yourself but for which you haven’t?

Asking for help? This is an original concept for me. I am not known for doing this often.

I tell myself that it’s not because of my gigantic ego and that I simply don’t want to inconvenience anyone else (or rely on anyone else to come through for me…aah, some real truth behind it sneaks in, yes?)

But in fact, it probably is ego, even if I’m unwilling to admit it. Yet I’m well aware that there are SO many things for which I know little or nothing about. So what would possess me to insist on doing it all myself?

I can point to some things in my past – feeling disappointed or let down by others who SAID they would help but in fact didn’t; working with others who claimed to know something and when it came right down to it, had less of a clue than me; and living and working independently throughout busy teen and college years as an only child – after a while, you simply become self-sufficient and flying solo is sometimes all you know.

But I’m missing out on some important opportunities, and now as a much older chick (much older than I care to contemplate some mornings), I realize that. So where could I probably use the most help?

Thankfully, in the past couple of years, I’ve finally connected with a tax accountant and financial advisor to help in some areas, but I’m sure a book coach could be helpful to me since I’m constantly finding excuses to pull myself in other directions, someone to keep me on task. (Please note: do not solicit me in droves any of you who might be in this line of  work. A simple  introduction will do at my Facebook page, if you must…)

I know at some point, I’m going to need to work with a stylist to help me find ways to create and sustain a personal brand/image and it’s so important that it feel as natural, comfortable and authentic as it can be, particularly if—okay, WHEN — I do publish and am in a position where I will need to speak to small groups or who knows, maybe someday, LARGE groups (ahem, passing out right here on the keyboard even just contemplating this thought). I have to feel confident that the image I’m projecting really is me but that it takes into account that no, I can’t walk up and meet people in my tan capris, Tampa Bay Rays T-shirt and New Balance sneaks. That may be a common workplace uniform here at home, but it’s just not going to cut it at a networking event or book signing.

Similarly, I know that at some point, when I’m a few more chapters into my book that I’m writing, I need to reach out to peer review groups or writing circles. I have access to them. I just haven’t taken advantage of them and honestly, up until recently, I haven’t had much to bring to such a meeting in person or virtually. That’s finally starting to change as I grow more absorbed in the fiction work I’ve gotten lost writing recently.

These are just a few of the people who I know I need and relatively soon (if not yesterday). And I know there are even more people who could be of help to me personally as well as professionally. Where could YOU use that extra set of ears (or hands) to assist? Are there core areas of your life where maybe someone else’s feedback, perspective or wisdom could enrich that part of your life?

I hope that you too take a few moments to sit back, daydream while gazing out of the window to really think about your work, your personal life, your relationships – life – and get real with yourself. It’s not comfortable by any means, downright frightening coming up with the list and even more scary reaching out to these people to ask, but if we aren’t equipped with this much-needed knowledge, we’re really missing out on all that we could potentially gain. Good luck and be brave!

Cheers to finding that daily spark in your life,


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